Need A Distraction

So it’s proven. When you try to move on, the hardest part is not the first few days but all the days after. You try so hard in the beginning to live your life and everything would seem to start to fall into place. You see the sun shine again and feel so glad thinking that.. you did it!

Living your life like it’s the first day of your existence. Though you occasionally still think about the other person, you think that it’s very normal. That the fact you can spend a day without checking their last seen on WhatsApp or profile picture or status in every social media is a good progress.

Everything runs smoothly until just a couple days after, you, out of curiosity open their messaging or social media profile to see how they’re doing. You can’t even explain to yourself why you did it or what you actually expect to see. Will you really be happy when you find they’re doing good or would it make you feel miserable?

When something doesn’t seem to be okay, does it relieve you that you’re not the only one wounded or would it feel like an ordeal that you can’t even ask what’s going on, let alone immediately get around to ease their pain?

Frankly, I’m not sure how I’m going to survive all these days for the rest of my life. For me, you’re always a distraction. In a way I could never comprehend, yet has always brightened my days. The way you called my name so cheerfully, the way you sing with that soothing voice, the way you made me worry with your sentimental thought. Even seeing you from afar can make me so happy.

Now, it seems like I need a distraction from you, my most lovable distraction. So how about you live your life nicely. I’ll live mine as good as I could too. A couple of years from now, I’ll make a wish upon the star and pray to the one who create it for us to meet again, in a much better version than we currently are. Then I’ll embrace the truth, be happy for you and be thankful for the moments we once had.

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